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What happens when we have everything we’ve dreamed of?

Updated: Oct 27, 2021

Twice a year, I get my hair done.

The whole shebang -- color, cut, shampoo, condition, style. Since my head is blessed with a thick nest, the appointment takes a good three to four hours on average. Which means plenty of time to chat with my stylists.

One reason I keep going back to this particular stylist -- besides his obvious skill with the scissors -- is because of our conversations.

Back of woman grasping red hair

xoxo, gossip girl

Ten minutes in, and we’ve skipped right past the stereotypical “salon gossip” and into the good stuff.

This time, we talked about what happens after our dreams come true.

Say you’ve got your dream job, family life, social life, and enough money to sustain the lifestyle you’ve always wanted… then what?

I can see it going one of two ways -- either you are happy with your life or you’re not.

If you are… then yes! I am happy for you. And I truly wish you lasting joy. You've probably mastered what I'm about to get into.

But I’m guessing the majority of us falls into the other category -- the “not” happy. Not having enough. Or having too much.

One of my hair stylists brought up the thought of suicide.

“What if when we have everything we want, we don’t have a reason to live anymore?”

Well, I can honestly say I have never considered this. Being so happy that there’s nothing left to accomplish -- or hope for -- anymore.

Maybe this is where the saying “I can die happy” comes from?

I can’t say. I've never gotten to this point. I’ve only ever known the chase of reaching my goals.

Hey Google, play “The Climb”

by miley cyrus

*Jams out in room*

I digress.

Since we’re creatures of habit, I can try to imagine my response to having everything I've ever wanted, using a much (much!) smaller example.

Okay, stay with me here…

During my apartment move, I was on the manhunt for a good entryway bench. I had a very specific vintage-but-boho vision. The problem was the price. I'm talking hundreds of dollars for a couple pieces of wood nailed together. #rusticchic #HGTVtoldmeso

But, once the seed of an idea is planted in my head, nothing will stop it from growing.

Let me tell you, I scoured Facebook Marketplace, Craigslist, and all the second-hand sites, like a sailor lost at sea.

I finally found a local guy who handmade benches. Real cedar. Vintage-but-boho. And for only $30. I thought, “This is it!”

But God was testing my patience.

Turns out these benches were selling like hot cakes. And even though I had messaged the seller to coordinate a pickup, he sold the bench he supposedly custom-made for me.

Then left for vacation.

Then raised the price when he returned.

My stubborn Capricorn ego was bruised. I wanted the deal I thought I had made. But that’s not what I got.

So, back to scouring the sea of online sales.

About two weeks later, lying in bed at 10:13 p.m. on a Tuesday night, I saw it. Freshly posted on Facebook Marketplace. A padded bench. Vintage. Boho. And it was free.

I messaged the seller quicker than teens hopping on a TikTok trend, and after another excruciating day of waiting, she told me it was mine.

Finally! The missing piece to my home decor dreams.

Now, every time I walk by that bench, I take a moment to sit (literally!) and appreciate what it took to get it.

If you’ve stuck with me this far, thank you.

my point is...

Sometimes not getting what we originally want is because we’re going to get something even better.

Whether that something is a bench. A job opportunity. A relationship. Even a lesson to learn.

There is a reason for waiting. And we can actively wait in expectation. (Psalm 5:3)*

  • Ask.

  • Wait.

  • Expect.

  • Enjoy.

The last bullet point is important. Learn to enjoy the moments of waiting, the anticipation and the actual receiving.

Savor every step.

Because these are the steps that are meant to lead us along our path to true happiness.

“These tiny steps of discipline… will keep you close to Me on the path of Life.” -Sarah Young, author of #JesusCalling

And don’t compromise. We need to stop asking for what we think is just reasonable or good enough.

Whether or not we think we deserve more, we are not meant to live compromised lives.

Ask for something bigger.

Ask for diamonds. Not dimes. Then wait, watch, receive, and repeat.


*In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice;

in the morning I lay my requests before you

and wait expectantly.

-Psalm 5:3

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